Weak and Unworthy

A lot of things change by the months. Doubts. Discouragements. Feelings. Relationships. Plans. Fears. Joys. Perspectives. Hearts. I feel the past couple months I have been, "blown and tossed by the waves" so to speak. Avoiding reflection and updating afraid of what I would find. Not wanting to face failures.
Thursday December 27th I will be flying out for Maturin, Venezuela. A place I have been twice before. A place of memories. A place of regrets. A place where God wants me to be. As I embark on this next adventure in my life, I have already been through a roller coaster of emotions. Excitement. Fear. Nervous. Anxious. Giving up. Walking away. Persistance. Challenge. As each wave has come and gone, a new lesson was learned. I hope to apply these lessons to life, to keep them in front of me. To be wise in my decisions. To be steadfast in my convictions. To keep things in perspective. To be aware of my attitude, my words, my actions. To count my blessings. To surrender. To trust my God.
I have recently read the book, "Captivating" by Stasi and John Eldredge. Wonderful book for any woman. Today I experienced a renewed freedom in Christ - freedom from wounds, hurts, broken relationships that have been pulling me down. There's a new joy and hope in my heart.